Moms, we are with you…

It’s also Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Month, did you know? I didn’t, until I stumbled upon Ashley Anderson‘s article last Friday.  Now you know what that means to me, so I won’t delve much into it. I do want to express my deep sorrow through her words.

Our experiences were different, but we were on the same boat. And now, we’re learning to swim, maybe in a different way, too, but we’re both surviving in our own ways. The way a lot of mothers who were on the same boat as well are coping with life.

To our fellow moms, I only have to say that we must strive to enjoy life every day, enjoy even the tiniest bit of things. And never, ever lose hope…

Pregnancy & Infant Loss

Awareness Month

October is pregnancy and infant loss awareness month. For those of you who know me, it’s something that is near and  dear to my heart. Not everyone is comfortable with talking about their journey and loss, but I’ve found that with speaking out about pregnancy loss can help with healing, open up conversation and help connect people who have been affected by loss. 1 in 4 women experience pregnancy and infant loss. It’s time we talk about it.

Here is my story:

My husband and I decided quite early on that we wanted children. It was something that was never really discussed seriously, just something that was important to both of us. We decided in early 2012 that we would start trying (a few months before our wedding) because things like that never happen right away. Well, it did. I conceived the first time in early February of that year…

Read full article

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If you need someone to talk to privately, even just to listen, feel free to email me at j.gi.federizo@gmail.com.

I do advise that you first turn to your loved ones because in such trying times, they must be your first line of support. Grief and sorrow can be lessened when you have a strong support system. If it is a depression that is way beyond the powers of your loved ones, consider getting professional help. It is never wrong to ask for help.

Our Pain is Real

I distinctly remember a co-worker telling me in early March to read Filipina actress Rica Peralejo‘s emotional blog post regarding losing her baby. I did not want to. Being pregnant and worrying about my own baby’s real condition already stressed me out, I did not want to entertain more possibilities of losing my second chance of becoming a mother. But now here I am, sharing this:

RICA PERALEJO’S PAIN AND PEACE

I share this not because it is interesting enough, but because she has somehow given voice to me, to my pain. She was me when I lost Baby Jamie. I certainly hope she won’t be me the next time. Talking about my first pregnancy and the miscarriage (baby was at its third month) was already hard for me before, our second tragedy (baby was going to be at its seventh month) just made me feel worse. Really writing about it, about losing Baby Zoe and coping with grief, is something I still can’t handle.

I try to be at peace with myself. It’s a constant struggle. The pain is real.

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Thank you, friends, for understanding me…