He catches my eye in an instant.
From far across the room, he watches me with a steady gaze, nervous but steady. And I catch my breath. I can feel butterflies doing flip-flops in my stomach. Who would have thought that butterflies could flip-flop?
Still catching my breath as I return his gaze. My, he has come here today looking his best. He has all my attention, that most handsome man in the room. Somehow, I am nervous, but it is a somewhat warm, tingly, funny, nervous sensation running through my every nerve. Weird.
I enter the room ever-so-slowly, my legs trembling like jello with every step.Take it easy,I remind myself, he isn’t going anywhere.He doesn’t seem to at all, not when he smiles at me with that familiar happy and knowing smile.
It is the smile of the friend who has always been there for me through thick and thin, maybe thinner still. Sometimes, he is there to cheer me up when I’m down. Sometimes, he is simply there to help pick up the broken pieces of me. Many times, we fix the pieces together till I’m whole again and almost brand new. Yet other times, he lets me do the cheering, the picking, and the fixing for him.
He is still smiling.
I am reminded of the times he smiles at me when we dance, when he holds me close like I am the only woman in the world for him (never mind that he manages to occasionally step on my feet). Or about those times when he sings sweet songs just for me (never mind that he rather sings off-key and has only perfected the tune to Happy Birthday so far). Or about those many times when he writes me love letters or tries to create poems which I religiously keep in a shoebox together with remnants of other stuff from him (never mind that he does often get carried away and say the corniest things…which I love to read over and over, by the way).
He winks at me and my heart skips a beat.
I love it when he winks at me. It is like sharing a secret that only the two of us know, like a bond, or a pact, or a whatever-you-may-call-it. For me, it is a promise. It is a promise that he will love me and cherish me and shelter me, simply because I am me.
I wink back. Ditto.
He smiles even wider. He got the message. Oh, we could just look at each other and know, just know. I sigh a contented sigh to myself as I reach him and stand before him. This is my perfect lover – Mr. Not-So-Perfect, who fits me quite perfectly.
This is the man I want to wake up to every morning, and sleep together with at night even if he snores. I might snore myself but he will never ever complain. What’s a snore compared to having each other anyway? He appreciates my cooking efforts and loves me all the more for trying, especially not to burn anything. I can talk to him about intellectual stuff like books, poetry, and life, and about trivial things such as the weather and, oh yeah, TV cartoons that we shamelessly watch without worrying too much about age. He does not undermine me by letting me win the games, but does not get mad when I kick his butt in Scrabble and chess. Maybe we don’t agree about everything – he is neither domineering nor a push-over – but this we do know: RESPECT. Our motto.
I sigh again. He is looking at me now with happy, googly eyes.
The man in front of us clears his throat to begin. But before he does, Mr. Right takes my hand, swallows hard, and says the sweetest words next to “I love you” – “I DO.”
I laugh and say, “I KNOW.”
Copyright © June 2002 – 2015 J.Gi Federizo
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